Fueled by Fug

2009-01-13T20:07:00.000-08:00

Et tu, Beckett? Nice titanic haircut.

2008-07-06T20:43:00.000-07:00

Since last we spoke, Panic at the Disco have turned into three Beatles and Bearded Ellen Degeneres. I am so confused by their recent stylistic decisions. They're like a weird conglomeration of the 70s and mid90s. I should be glad that Ryan "Forehead" Ross finally saw the (black)light but I think the bowlcut is really more of a lateral move from the titanic haircut than a step up.

Why does Ryan Ross have so many lapels? I counted and there are THREE SETS. Is that a floral vest? WHY DOES HIS POCKET SQUARE CLASH? I appreciate his attention for detail, I do, but it's often times kind of misguided.

Jon Walker's vest and trousers make him look a little bit stout-- or at least very strangely proportioned. I truly mourn what joining this band has done to him. One of the constants in my relationship with this band has been the fact that I would definitely sleep with him, but this makes me almost question that. And I am easy, y'all.

As for Brendon and Spencer, my beef with their outfits is the same: clashing patterns. I'm seeing this on the runway too, and I don't get it. I still kind of hate that they are not sticking to a uniform color pallette.

Panic at the Disco, what happened? You went from bad to worse. What happened to your glam rocky makeup and Dior Homme-esque outfits? Now that you guys can afford couture, you're sticking to 70s thrift store paisley? Dressing like the Beatles won't make you relevent.

2008-02-06T01:20:00.000-08:00

Oh hey there guys. Miss me? I bet you did, if any of the angry emails I got are to be believed!

Anyway, Panic! at the Disco is back and sadly did not take any of my advice in regards to styling. Instead I guess they want to be the Beatles? At least that's what Brendon's bowl cut would indicate. And is that a plaid pantsuit, Ryan Ross? I am a little bit bemused by the 70s baby mullet.
You look like Mary from Peter, Paul and Mary.

And while Ryan Ross finally turned Jon Walker into a badly dresses idiot, he is still the only member of Panic! at the Disco that any girl above 14 would fuck, which means he still wins.

Meanwhile, Spencer still looks like a pedophile cult leader. I guess some things truly never change.

Also: Why do their respective palettes not coordinate. These people have GOT to stop styling themselves.

2007-06-11T19:36:00.000-07:00

I was going to talk about Andy and the hideous Clandestine merchandise he is wearing but then I got distracted/blinded by Patrick's shiny, pleather-y, zippy jacket. What the hell is that thing? He looks like Missy Elliott back when she was was fatter and was into wearing trashbags.

2007-06-11T19:13:00.000-07:00

I don't know what the fuck is going on here. I don't know what's more perplexing, Ryan Ross' steadfast dedication to the Titanic haircut or Perez Hilton's ruddy complexion. Why is he so red? Is he drunk? Maybe he's excited to be so close to Ryan. Maybe he thinks Ryan is actually Leonardo DiCaprio.

I can't even make a mean comment about Ryan's Oliver outfit, Perez is just too confusing to look at.

2007-06-09T01:06:00.000-07:00

I found this picture on a certain celebrity gossip site, on a certain server that hosts certain online diaries. The post in question claimed that Pete is now a (gasp) pill popper, thanks to Yoko, and the rest of the band is threatening to quit if he doesn't straighten up (so to speak).

Perhaps it explains why he thought wearing a beanie to a social event that requires you to wear a tie was a good idea.

2007-05-14T22:32:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been so long since the last update but I'm afraid there is some sort of drought of new pictures lately. In fact, this isn't even a new picture (as evidenced by Jack Marin's presence with Sh**nt,) but it is a good example of a trend I hate, as far as streetwear goes. Meaning: the whole wacky, hideous print thing. When did it become cool to look like you got attacked by a six year old with a potato stamp and some fabric paint? I'm just picturing Pharrell or whoever, after his kid brother or nephew got lose in his closet, thinking "Yes, this will do."

Intellectually, I know it's a status thing like limited edition Dunks or logo clothing or the it bag for the season. You see a particular print and know that that shirt cost homeboy $300. I just think it's bullshit. Style has nothing to do with cost. That's why rich people have no sense of style. They think they can dress head to toe in trendy, expensive clothing and automatically it means they've got taste, but it doesn't, it just means they've got money.

Anyway, I also wanted to post this picture because Jack Marin looks like my aunt Carol. I am so glad he's no longer a member of Cute Is What We Aim For (by the way, losing the only semi-attractive member of your band is not such a good way of achieving said aim) because now I can stop kind of sort of not really caring about such a goddamn awful band. Also, and I know this is a cheap shot, but do you think it would be possible for Sh**nt to part his hair further to the side? Like, say, at his jaw? Because then maybe his face would entirely be covered and I wouldn't have to see it anymore.

2007-05-07T17:51:00.000-07:00

One day I will get to tell my grandchildren how I lived through a time when fashion meant matching the color of your weave to the color of your diaper.

If they don't believe me, I will have proof:

2007-04-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

Hi, Fueled by Fug readership. I'm Zani, I'm new, and you probably won't love me as much as you love Cloe, but I couldn't pass up an opportunity to publicly state just how much I hate this hoodie:

This hoodie is so ugly that it actually angers me. It may not seem that offensive but when you spend as much time on the internet as I do, you notice that Pete Wentz has about four outfits total unless someone else is styling him. And for some insane reason, this hoodie, paired with a pair of girl jeans, is one of them. I can't understand why he loves it so much. Think about how bad it must smell by now!
Okay, I like Morphine Generation. I own one of their hoodies. But mine is an oatmeal color that is fab for my skintone and it has a really interesting reproduction of an old lithograph on the back. Pete's is a dull gray color that does nothing to make him look less dead and, aside from a gothic M on the front (which you can't really see in this picture), it has nothing to draw the eye. But it's not just boring. There's some sort of dead animal around the hood. I think it's rabbit fur, but it's really just not cute. I'm pretty sure Pete's animal-friendly bros (and vegan bandmate Andy) aren't big fans of the fur.
Then there is the bass. Fashionable people have pretty much always been opposed to gaudy designer logos, and even more opposed to faux designer logos (design is, after all, intellectual property), but the Clandestine bartskull version of Louis Vuitton's signature print takes this trend to a whole new level of ew.

And Pete? Lay off the bronzer.

2007-04-30T12:53:00.000-07:00

I don't know what the hell is going on here. Spencer is rocking the molester 'stache, a hipster staple I've been against since the beginning. Maybe I'm a square but I just feel like your face is no place to be ironic. My friend this weekend said that sincerity is the new irony, I guess Spencer has not gotten the memo. He looks like the bearded lady after a trim.

2007-04-25T14:07:00.000-07:00

I like this picture because Peter looks as surprised that he was voted one of America's most beautiful as we were!
First off: I love this blazer. I know Ryan Ross has the same one in a lighter grey that I prefer, but this one is gorgeous, too. I love the white piping
and the cut looks nice on Pete.
The shirt is a pretty color I actually really like on Pete. The jeans are kind of a strange color but the cut and fit are nice. Really, the only thing I am slightly bewildered about as far as this outfit, is why Pete is wearing what appears to be black patent dock shoes. But at this point I am so happy to see Pete in something that doesn't terrify me, so I'll let it go.

God job, Peter! Next we'll tackle the hair and makeup, but this is already a huge step forward.

2007-04-22T22:55:00.000-07:00

I take back any praise I may have given to Ryan Ross. I haven't seen that haircut since it was on Devon Sawa. What next, Ross? Are you going to wear jeans ripped at the knee? How about a flannel shirt, worn over a Soundgarden T? I know you like Third Eye Blind, but there's no reason for you to look like an extra from Wild America. And then the ruffled shirt, and the vest, I mean, homeboy looks like a lapsed Mormon missionary from the mid-Nineties.

As far as darling Brendon Urie, his shirt is kind of ugly-- but I am not a big fan of the elaborate screenprint approach to designer streetwear, so it's to be expected. Also, he appears to be wearing two different shoes.

Also, and this is just my personal opinion, but Spencer and Jon are really looking worse for wear, aren't they?

2007-04-18T14:36:00.000-07:00

Word on the street says that Pete Wentz has designed a line of clothing for DKNY. Huh.

Perhaps the scarf is an ode to PATD?

2007-04-17T14:06:00.000-07:00

I actually think that Audrey looks good in these, she's obviously a really pretty girl. I'm over the pink hair but her facial structure is appealing and i like the bump on her nose. That being said-- no one, no one, is hot enough to pull off bright orange cut-off overalls.

FIRST POAST !!!!!11

2007-04-15T23:41:00.000-07:00

I am not normally one to make posts (I am a serial commenter, but poster; never), so when an opportunity arises, I HAVE to jump on it.

This here is a picture of my favorite FBR band, Panic! At the Disco. They seem to be wearing ladies' sunglasses. I know that cross-dressing is a favorite activity of these "teen heart-throbs". Blah blah, nothing new.

However, after a closer look, it seems that our boys are also sporting handbags (manbags?). DALMATIAN PRINT, handbags. I'm sorry, but the only person that is allowed to carry spotted handbags is Cruella DeVille.

At least Spencer looks pretty.

2007-04-14T16:44:00.000-07:00

So basically, this blog is turning into the Fall Out Boy and Panic! at the Disco show, which was something I'd hoped to avoid. But with Pete Wentz out and about with his Simpson sister of choice what seems like ALL THE TIME, there's a plethora of paparazzi shots for me to look at disgustedly. Now, Ashlee Simpson isn't really related to the scene kids and bands whose fashion I critique, but when you're boning Pete Wentz you become fair game. In any case, please observe these two outfits (photo and stupid MS paint commentary courtesy of Perez Hilton.)

Does Ashlee Simpson really like the Ramones? Really? Last time I saw her wearing a band shirt was an Adam Ant shirt, and I am almost 100% positive Ashlee's favorite song isn't Stand and Deliver. Now, I am not one of those people that go around calling other people poseurs, as I am above the age of 13 and secure in my own alternativeness or whatever, but I've never seen the point of wearing a band's shirt if you don't listen to the band. And maybe I'm wrong and Ashlee sobbed when Joey died like my punk rock friend Bianca did... but that still doesn't explain the suspenders-- or excuse me, braces, as my far classier British reader(s) would say. I would like to revise my previous statement that Ashlee's trying to pull off the Kate Moss-urban-boho thing, because that hat, that cardigan and most importantly, those braces, clearly say she's trying to pull off the Pete Doherty look. I'm surprised she's not wearing a fedora and a crackpipe.

Pete's outfit, for once, it a lot less offensive. Hoodie, ok, whatever, boring-- maybe the color washes him out a little. His shirt is probably some screenprint of some stupid, slightly depressing slogan. His jeans are probably worth more than my cell phone (and it's a Treo, y'all, those aren't cheap) but still manage to look like they're from the Gap. As an aside, I just want to say that I much prefer Pete--and most males, really-- in dark denim, even a darker grey maybe. The bag appears to be Burberry, or fake Burberry, which I really do not care for. Designer items, in most humble opinion, are meant to look expensive, but should not outright state that they are so-- lables, logos, and other similar markings should be minimal. I feel like anything else is meant to be an obvious show of wealth and, as such, is pretty tacky. My only exception to this is the Chanel logo, but only because the white on black is so aesthetically pleasing.

All that being said, Pete and Ashlee look really happy together, and really, I wish them the best from the bottom of the tiny lump of coal that is my heart.

2007-04-11T19:45:00.000-07:00

Part of what's so frustrating about Ryan Ross and his gang of mismatched misfits is that when he gets it right, he gets it really right. Which is why this series of photos is so heart-warming to a fan of classic menswear like me. This is a simple outfit, but it works-- I love Ryan in black and white. The leather jacket has a great cut.

But most of all... BANGS! And he's CLEAN SHAVEN! He could be wearing Spencer's lacy capris and I would be ecstatic.

2007-04-08T17:41:00.000-07:00

This photo is basically full of what I imagine Pete and Ashlee's relationship is like. He looks angry, she looks complacent-- or out of her mind on vicodin and vodka and red bull.
Pete and Ashlee are perfect for each other. They're both geniuses (genii?) at identifying trends and running with them... and failing completely.
Trend #1: vests over shirts. First, Pete's is vest buttoned, which is almost pathetically uncool. Second, it's over a graphic t-shirt, which looks awful with his patterned vest. Not to mention that vests, as a trend, are basically over unless it's over a button-down. Just saying. The jeans, I don't have a problem with, except that the picture's cut off at his knee and I have a sinking feeling that they are bootcut.
Trend #2: colored denim. I have mixed feelings about this trend to begin with, because unless you are stick-thin like Ashlee, they will make your ass look like a giant cupcake. That being said, I had seen red jeans look really great with the right outfit. However, these are, seriously, these are sky blue jeans. SKY BLUE. With what appears to be a a sleeveless button down (or, if I squint, a muscle shirt.) I watched Valley Girl this morning and I'm pretty sure that Julie's slutty friend with the huge hair wore this exact outfit. Retro fashion is great, but only if you take the pieces and modernize them. I'm pretty sure that the only thing that identifies this outfit as not having been worn in 1983 is Ashlee's stringy hair, a la Kate Moss. But Ashlee lacks everything that makes Kate Moss what she is-- namely, effortless cool.

2007-04-06T14:19:00.000-07:00

I originally uploaded this photo as yet another example of Panic! at the Disco's facial-hair related indiscretions , but within the couple seconds it takes to copy and paste the image code , I realized I couldn't do it. It might be that young Jon Walker here appears to be glowing from the inner majesty of his Jesus-like beard, it might be the terrified look upon his face, it might be that I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. I just couldn't make snide comments about, say, how terrible it is to have a member of Panic! at the Disco DJ anything, much less a dance night. But Jon has bangs and, somehow, I am mollified.

2007-04-03T22:34:00.000-07:00

Lately it seems that everybody in pop is becoming a parody of themselves. you've got Christina Aguilara imitating a WWII era bombshell like she's been doing for the past couple singles now, Avril Lavigne dressing in tiny plaid skirts and singing about how she's the motherfucking princess, Pink singing some song about masturbation. And you know what? That's fine. Pop stars are meant to be 2 dimensional, I recognize and appreciate it. But Peter, here, seems to be becoming a parody not of himself, but any pop star at all.

Now, I'm not going to pretend I know exactly what's going on here, and it is probably unfair to Pete to do this as I'm assuming it's a photoshoot that's been styled by somebody other than him. But let's talk about it. The jacket-- I don't hate it. It's big and ruched and silver, but it's so camp I can't help but kind of like it. The pants, though, are an awkward length that make the already diminutive Mr. Wentz look like a member of the Lollipop Guild's San Francisco division. I'm not fond of the shoes, either, they make me think of something Hillary Clinton (god bless 'er) might buy Bill. The hat appears to be some sort of seaman's cap-cum-crown, which implies to me that Peter is, in fact, the motherfucking princess, rather than Avril. Only, of the ocean. Or something.

2007-04-01T14:10:00.000-07:00

There's a lot to say about Audrey Kitching, most of it not very nice, but this is a fashion blog, not a personality critique blog so I'll refrain.

I am pretty sure that this is a New York Couture shot, which really explains the hideousness of all the clothing involved. The ties remind me of that tie skirt everybody made their freshman year and wore with a Bikini Kill shirt and converse sneakers. The tutus aren't even worth going over-- but I will. You guys, tutus aren't and will never be accepted as street clothing. They are for dancing, not walking around being xmetalx or whatever it is Audrey Kitching does when she's not nauseating us with her tacky portraits.

Her hair in combination with her blush and that thing she's wearing just makes her look like cotton candy. Based on previous photos, I think it's safe to say that looking like food is something dear Audrey aspires to, but that doesn't mean that I have to like it.

All that aside, I have seen Audrey wearing little or no makeup and I know she's a pretty girl, but all that warpaint she spackles on every morning make her look like a drag queen, and not even like a particularly convincing one.

Audrey, darling, I know that this whole thing (clown makeup, torn t-shirts, stringy pink hair and ratty extensions) is your shtick, but isn't it time to rethink it a little? Think of all the teenage girls ruining their hair and their pores to look like you. For their sake and for the sake of those of us with taste.

2007-03-31T15:53:00.000-07:00

dear panic! at the disco,

when i first heard of you sometime last year, i actually liked i write sins... because it sounded like something off of a disney movie soundtrack, and i am really into disney. i saw the video and kind of liked you a little more because, even though brendon (whom i referred to as "that top hat guy with the dsls" internally btw) looked like an idiot and there was entirely too much spencer shots, the guy who played the groom was hot and i am easy to please. i then immediately forgot about you, which, thinking back, is where our story together should have ended. instead, sometime this summer, i got linked to the now defunct scenequeenmedia on livejournal, and was in equal parts fascinated and horrified by the way these girls had been glorified merely for fucking (or not fucking, in jac's case) these two dudes. i discovered that in the time since iwsnt had come out, you'd released a few more singles and traded in a vaguely awkward bassist for a much cuter one. this was right smack in the middle of your transformation from a band to Performers! at the Cabaret. ryan, since last time i had seen him, had thrown out the fingerless gloves and gotten white satin ones instead. he'd started painting shit on his face and gotten a weird mullet. rosevests were involved. it was kind of riduclous but also made sense, in a way. from top hats to rosevests, the transformation was logical. you were new and improved, p!atd! the music was still questionable but the look was fierce. as a shamelessly shallow person, i took a stand and said, "I Like Panic! at the Disco!"

then sometime this fall, you stopped shaving. you guys all renounced bangs. you started wearing little lace-up capris, spencer. i just don't get it. where is that scene dior homme loving band i used to love despite myself? it's gone, along with the mac cosmetix of yore (except for spencer's retarded goatee and brendon's doll shit what the fuck is that.) now, there's just a quartet of strangely feminine mountain men, foreheads bare and free. are you growing beards because you feel your face is too naked, due to your lack of bangs?

now, i know that bands have to grow, as performers and as musicians, that you can't keep doing the same stuff over and over. bowie didn't, mercury didn't, and although i loathe to compare you, you are clearly modeling yourself them. but listen, did bowie grow a freakish beard? no, he went to berlin and where his daily caloric intake was roughly based on how much vodka and coke he'd consumed that day. he went insane, made a fucking genius album and then came back as the thin white duke! now, i'm not suggesting that you guys pick up an eating disorder or a coke habit (although i think i'm too late where brendon is concerned.) all i'm saying is, beards don't have to be part of your new image. but then-- anybody who's read backstage passes by angela bowie knows the epic proportions of bowie's "lance of love," so perhaps he never felt the need to exert his manhood. perhaps that's what's causing this.

in any case, i have a solution for you, panic! at the disco. skinny jeans, leopard print, gold eyeshadow. i have a vision and it looks a lot like the manic street preacher's 1992 tour. get ryan a dress. i've heard that mens' heels are in for this fall, might i suggest that also? the whole mime/circus thing is getting old, panic! darlings.

also, please get bangs. i'm looking at you, ryan "forehead" ross.

love,
cloe